Personal Relationships-Many Relationships Many Rules

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There are many types of personal relationships we enter into throughout our lives. We have romantic relationships, relationships with friends and family and even relationships with our children and co workers. For each type of relationship there is usually a distinct set of “rules” or at least expectations.

So many people struggle unnecessarily when it comes to their personal relationships. I am not a therapist or a counselor but I do have a pretty good idea as to why some people just can’t seem to have a solid and healthy relationship.

I believe that no matter what type of relationship you have the ultimate success or failure will all begin with you. Here is what I mean:

1. If you are insecure you will attract other insecure people to you. Talk about the blind leading the blind. These types of relationships aren’t healthy or strong because the people in them aren’t healthy and strong, and least not emotionally.

Now I’m not talking about having some insecurity, we all have those. I’m talking about the deep seated feelings of not being good enough… at anything. Most people would deny that they are insecure but it’s really pretty easy to spot the signs.

For men it often shows up as overcompensating. They have a big truck or they talk overly loud or act overly macho. They often like to find submissive women who they can push around.

For women it shows up as being a submissive woman who is pushed around.

If you find yourself to be in a bad relationship take some time to “strengthen” yourself. That is, in my opinion, one of the best things you can do to have better relationships. This applies to all types of relationships and not just romantic ones.

2. Another problem many people have, and I think this is directly related to insecurity too, is that they can’t seem to speak up. They allow others to talk over them both literally and figuratively. They just don’t have a “voice” and they aren’t good at “demanding” that someone listen.

Find your voice. Teach yourself how to identify your feelings and be able to express those feelings to the people in your life. Don’t be afraid of the reactions you may get, they may not be ideal, but ultimately learning to express yourself will allow you to meet more confidant people and have better relationships.

When people think of relationship issues they almost always think of romantic relationships, but that is just one of many types of relationships most people will have during their lifetime. Many of the elements that go into a successful and happy relationship can be learned. If you are willing to invest some time, and maybe find a good therapist, you can make changes and improve all the relationships in your life.

Personal relationships can be the best part of our lives or they can be something that brings us a lot of pain. While we don’t have complete control over the outcome of any given relationship, there are many things you can do to increase your odds of having more satisfying relationships and fewer bad ones.

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