How To Actually Conquer Imposter Syndrome

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Today we are talking about self-doubt. The particular self-doubt that gets in your head, maybe when you’ve gotten a promotion, or you just started dating someone that is a bit out of your league. It says: “You don’t deserve this, you shouldn’t be here”.

This is called imposter syndrome, and unfortunately, it can make you self sabotage the thing that you just got so you fall back to where you feel comfortable, even though you were deserving of what you had. Which is why in this video, I will talk about three behavioral changes to CRUSH imposter syndrome.


1:55 – Change #1: You will not overstate what you can do going forwards
3:32 – Change #2: Take honest stock of your past, then see if you can help
4:50 – Change #3: Focus on creating results for the people around you

#SelfDevelopment #CharismaOnCommand #ImposterSyndrome

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26 Replies to “How To Actually Conquer Imposter Syndrome”

  1. FINALLY in a low whisper, he said, ‘I think I might be a terrible person.’ For a split second I believed him – I thought he was about to confess a crime, maybe a murder. Then I realized that we all think we might be terrible people. But we only reveal this before asking someone to love us. It is a kind of undressing. -Miranda July

  2. Good video! I'm glad there are videos like yours that bring awareness to Imposter Syndrome. It would be great if you could talk about it in the future not in the business sense, but in the academic sense–like a person who got accepted to an elite school, and when they get there they feel like they don't belong or deserve to be there. Just a suggestion. 🙂

  3. I am not even an expert at being myself. I only wish to become and expert at not dwelling upon my mistakes and use such downfalls in my life as potential learning experiences to make myself as well as everyone i care about sincerely happy in ways that are not selfish or deceitful.

  4. Good video, here's my summary:
    • Imposter syndrome = self-doubt that says "u don't deserve this / to be here" (e. g. after getting a promotion)
    • Can make u self-sabotage that thing u just got -> u fall back 2 where u where before (/felt comfortable)
    • World is full of imposters; having a healthy dose of scepticism towards ur own abilities is good (prevents overconfidence bias)
    • Mindset to deal with imposter syndrome: "They're not expecting me to be the best in the world. They're expecting me to help in the way that I say I can. If I do that, I'm not an imposter."
    • This mindset implies three behavioral changes:
    a. Don't overstate what u can do
    i. Draw clear boundaries over what u can / can't do yet
    b. Take an honest stock of your past, then see if u can help
    i. Weigh all positive against all negative feedback: What overweighs? Don't sweat the small stuff.
    c. Focus on creating results for the people around u
    i. People don't care about ur credentials; they want u to change their life in a positive way

  5. Generally love your videos but I have to say that you missed the target on this one. Impostor Syndrome is when you can do the job or you are worthy of the situation, but you still fear that you are not and that any day now you'll be discovered. For example: maybe you've been doing a good job for several years, but you still live in fear that sometime very soon, something will come along that will reveal that you aren't nearly as competent as your boss and coworkers believe you are. The fact that that "revealing event" never occurs doesn't diminish your unfounded fears. Another example may be that someone believes that they are not as interesting, intelligent, attractive, fashionable, as their group of friends. Even though that group of friends really like the person, they live with the nagging feeling that they don't deserve to be a member of this friend group and that soon, the friends will realize it. What you're describing is this video is more like "Poser Syndrome" (don't know if that's actually a thing) where you've, intentionally or unintentionally, put yourself into a position that you are not prepared for. Impostor Syndrome = fearing that you're not worthy when you actually are. Poser Syndrome = when you are pretending to be worthy or capable of something that you are not. PS: Impostor is spelled with 2 'o's and no 'e's.

  6. Near the end of the video, why did you say “for Ben and I” instead of “for Ben and me”? (If Ben hadn’t been involved, would you have said “for I”?

  7. I hate imposter syndrome. Whenever it is that I'm about to start a relationship with someone, there's this voice in my head like "you sure? maybe you don't like her anymore. responsibility is scary, y'know…". Dammit.

    But anyways, you're welcome, Charlie.

  8. Thank you so much for this. I often get in my own way because of imposter syndrome. It’s good to have these perspectives for self reflection.
    I really like your content. You have an answer for almost every situation. I also like how you address how you will be perceived with real examples.

  9. Video feels like it's talking more about self-awareness than imposter syndrome. Or is that the point of the video — fighting imposter syndrome with self-awareness? Sorry, listening while doing laundry LOL

  10. I have an issue where when I am successful in some application for something, I look back at the application documents and try to remember things I probably did good in an attempt to self-satisfy myself. But at the same time, I seriously feel like this is a very bad habit since I am not looking at the things I probably did bad or wrong that I should improve, thus not improving myself at all. I feel like I am conveniently cherry picking things that would make me feel better, which later turns into "I feel like a fake" or "full of myself". Would this count as imposter syndrome? Or would this count as narcissism?

  11. 💙 I loved this, thank you for redirecting my thoughts about feelings lesser. You made feeling like an imposter a positive thing 💙

  12. Watched this video after being awarded a PhD / he tells me I’m not expected to be an expert. Damn

  13. When you said "Thank you" at the beginning of the video, I felt tears coming up. Have been working very hard for many years on conquering my imposter syndrome. Recently turned down a job with no challenge and where I would have been underpaid, because I realized I should authorize myself to aim higher. Thanks for all your videos, they help me in countless ways.


  15. I feel like this is a complete misrepresentation of what imposter syndrome actually is. I like the message of how not to be an imposter, but imposter syndrome is not something to celebrate. It means a person doesn't know their own worth. For a lot of people it's a symptom of chronic gaslighting from a loved one.

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