How To Make Anyone Immediately Regret Insulting You

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People can be hostile with a fake friendly demeanor. It becomes tricky to know whether to confront them or just smile through it.

That’s why In today’s video we’re covering a 4 step method you can use to stand up to rude, passive-aggressive behavior without being a jerk. We’ll be using a tense Robert Downey JR interview we covered in one of our first videos, but we thought an update with more concrete advice and visuals would be useful.


0:00 – Intro
0:21 – N: Nonverbally warn them to stop
2:21 – I: The indirect warning shot
3:31 – C: The callout
4:48 – E: Exit the situation

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27 Replies to “How To Make Anyone Immediately Regret Insulting You”

  1. Could anyone give a tip what to do when some people shout out 'Ching Cheng chong' and immediately runaway on the street or in a public space? I once chased them to educate them but didn't seem work.

  2. Here's how you make someone regret disrespecting you: fight bias with bias. I did the same thing when l taught my boss a lesson on why tactlessness and condescension is wrong. She once questioned me for putting black linens on the tables for the wedding reception instead of white, the correct/usual color (but in my defense, we usually put on black linens for any event, and I don't even generally set the reception linens). Oh, and she was upset I had signed up for a one-person shift. I'll admit, I am much better with a helping hand and guide, but come on, that's no excuse for being insensitive. One of our student leader's responsibilities is organizing who works which shifts on the schedule, and my boss scolded him for not noticing I had signed up for a one-person shift. When she asked him if she thought I could do the shift, I answered for him with a firm "yes," because I felt belittled by her. She said she didn't think so, was all "I've told you not to sign up for shifts by yourself, I've been very clear about that, I don't know how much clearer I can get for you to listen" (something like, that, so I'm not perfectly quoting her), and she told me I need someone there to give me instructions and guide me. I regretfully didn't stand up for myself because I was too intimidated

    But feeling resentfully brave and determined this time, I decided to do what she did to me back to her. My college's disability services was hosting a program to educate and prepare Special Ed kids who were considering enrolling here. We caterers were serving the food, and every time I saw my boss talking to a teenager, I would immediately go over there and either a. tell my boss she's needed somewhere or if she can help me with something, or b, offer my help to the kid. My boss eventually concluded that I was deliberately trying to keep her away from the students, and she insisted I tell her what was going on. I acted like I had no choice and "admitted" I was trying to prevent her from potentially saying anything offensive to the learning-disabled kids. I acted like I was trying to protect them because I wasn't sure she would be 100% respectful; that I worried she might say something condescending, even if unintentionally. When she expressed her offense at such a judgmental, faithless perspective, I referenced what she'd said to me about working alone (without sounding passionate or angrily offended). I told her what I was doing wasn't so much as having no faith in her; that I thought of it more as doing what I thought was best for our learning-disabled guests, same as her that other day, for the greater good based on realistic past experience. Without seeming passive-aggressive, I wanted to indicate to her how my underestimating her is equivalent to her underestimating me (while again, disguising it as practicality for the greater good), to make a point to her. Like I said you gotta fight bias with bias, and that includes condescension.

  3. This is really important. You have to be willing to leave any situation, if it is hostile to you – even if you stand to gain from staying, or lose a lot by leaving, it is very important to remember that this option needs to be on the table – when it is not, that's either because you're being restrained and physically forced or coerced into that situation (which, there is not neccesarily something you can do if you are in a bad situation, whether enslaved, kidnapped, or dependent, and that is a different topic), or because your fears of leaving are inappropriatly keeping you in a situation where the truthes of staying are worse than the consequences of leaving and starting a new. Getting out is not always the answer, but it often is, and that is extremely important to drill into people, especially young, impressionable people, that they can have choice in their life, and that is so powerful.

  4. I am not sure why this is rude. It is noty the role of national newspapers to promote commercial ventures . There is a moral dilemma which you have over stepped.

  5. 1. Non-verbal warning.
    2. Indirect warning, questions about what people are doing but subtle enough without assuming malicious intent, explain what you like &/ dislike.
    3. Call out.
    4. Exit.

  6. This is something that's hard in high school, and I assume in young adult life in general. I coined the term "measured response" for myself because it's hard to really know how to respond to these situations appropriately. Sure, you could punch them in the face, but that's pretty over the top, insane-looking, and gets you in a lot of trouble. You could, as he said, smile through it- but that labels you as a doormat. It's a hard line to walk.

  7. the bad thing is when you already do that and people have THE AUDACITY to actually laugh off your signs.
    You have been warned!

  8. man i just got a feeling after watching this video that on thumnail of this video he showed it as this video is about robert downey jr but he just bought russel conversation in middle and his whatever its called charisma university into it probably this 2 irrelevant thing which is has added to this video has more duration than robert downey jr whole interview has nice trick to fool people

  9. I never give any warning did I get a warning no the hole building who ever is in it boom for the bs thay pulled that only a few know about but will spread it when I die and thay will fall one way or always win win win win ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? ????

  10. I remember when LeBron James did this when he walked out on an interview also.. I think he did it well, also.

  11. i’m a bartender and sometimes customers are sooooo rude, especially in this time of COVID, and i typically just lay down and take it but i’m gonna be n.i.c.e ????

  12. Not sure how much crossover there is here, but Jeff Nippard and Charisma on Command have incredibly similar speech pentameter and speaking styles

  13. I do not regard Robert Downey Jr in this clip as a role model. Actually this was pretty average reaction of a pretty average, slightly arrogant but yet polite, and unsecure teenager – expressing discomfort, objecting the other person and then running away. A mature person would have behaved quite differently (and the host would not feel happy too).

  14. Ok. Now tell us how to do all this when we DONT have ppl watching us so we dont look bad. NOW tell us how to demand respect without worrying about embarrassing ourselves in public

  15. Its funny because its very hard to watch. He's such a good guy and for him to get upset like that makes absolutely everyone feel bad.

  16. The trickiest place to use these techniques is in the home, or with a person who has sociopathic, psychopathic, or narcissistic traits

  17. The conduct of this interview has always bothered me in a way that goes beyond other interviews which went in a similar trajectory. The thing is, unlike most people, I really don't think Krishnan Guru-Murthy was goading Robert Downey Jr. for views; I believe that KGM was genuinely curious about the things he was asking. The problem is, he chose to go about it in the most bull-headed manner imaginable.

    There are a myriad different elements of the interview that made KGM's approach flat-out obtuse—the fact that he deviated from the agreed-upon topic of discussion, the complete disregard for the social cues being given off by RDJ, the phrasing of what he had wanted to ask, the unwarranted invasion into RDJ's private affairs, etc. It would take a long time to deconstruct every facet of what made KGM's conduct so unseemly, but the long and short of it is that he was not concerned with being respectful towards RDJ and his unspoken boundaries. KGM was preoccupied solely with his own curiosity, and refused to entertain the notion that his line of questioning was both inopportune and invasive.

    What sets this interview apart from others is the reaction it received. Oftentimes, when you have a celebrity walking out of an interview, the response is mixed: some people argue that it was justified, others take to calling the interviewee a "diva". In this particular case, there was no such divergence of opinion. This was one of a select few instances where everyone, regardless of their political or ideological leanings, had agreed that someone's behavior crossed the line. KGM was rightly condemned for his treatment of RDJ, and RDJ deserves every bit of praise he has received for how he handled the situation. It was a masterclass in setting, communicating, and enforcing unspoken boundaries when dealing with people who possess such a dearth of empathy.

  18. All of this sounds cool and all but I'm not walking on eggshells for anyone. I'll be myself and people are either going to like me or they aren't.

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